Saturday, October 16, 2010

Things I hate.

This is fueled by my current dislike of the Mexican Airline industry.

I hate it when my hair starts to smell like hair, you know, when it doesn’t really smell like shampoo anymore. It’s that feeling you get when your shower quits working and you have to wash your face in the bathroom sink at school.

I hate TOURISTS! I understand that you want to come to Mexico, the place where I live, and see its beauty (or the beauty of the inside of the five star hotels) but /I/ do not need to see you squeezed into a pair of shorts and a shirt that give you a super-uber muffin-top. Nor do I need to see you walking around in a bikini that doesn’t fit your tatas. If your ladies are trying to untie themselves then your top is TOO TIGHT!

You know the little safety seals on bottles of… whatever? I ALWAYS cut myself on those! I don’t even know why! I must have a really thin dermis.

I hate airport security. Perhaps more than anything else.

I mean I understand that they’ve got out security in mind and blah blah blah BLAH! But I don’t need to have a strip search done every time I’m in line. It always seems to go like this:

First I get stuck in line behind the tourist that has never flown before. I don’t know HOW they do it, because honestly how many people have never flown before? I’m usually ready with my hoodie and my shoes off, ready to show that my Toms can’t possibly be hiding any bombs or anything. But the people in front of me are fiddling around with their converse or their steel toed boots or rollerblades or whatever stupid thing they are wearing and still wearing their jackets as they fiddle with that.

(People always seem to get their zippers stuck when they’re in front of me! So it takes forever to get their jackets undone because suddenly everyone in America has some mild form of mental retardation, mind you if the person actually WERE mentally retarded I would be less annoyed and much more understanding, but honestly, what are the odds that I would ALWAYS get stuck behind a mentally handicapped person?)

The next fun part is when they have to unpack their stuff. First they don’t even have their liquids in LITTLE BOTTLES, something that has been PROTOCOL SINCE 2002... then they have to throw a fit when the security men tell them to throw it away… a tantrum of sorts… are you really that attached to a bottle of shampoo?

Then they throw a fit because they have to unpack their laptops! Why don’t you just carry a carry-on like a normal person instead of an over-sized purse. NO ONE cares that you have to rearrange your overly useless purse to get it back in there… we just want to get on the plane!

It’s also always interesting to me that the people mentioned above always seem to be able to find a way to be LATE for their flights. They’re always screaming about how they’re going to be late.

This is why they say ARRIVE TWO HOURS EARLY!

I mean it’s pretty clear when you buy your ticket online. One hour for domestic, at LEAST two hours for international… am I the only one who is able to read who flies in this country?

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